


Hubcaps and Dry Scones (Or My Best Friend is a Conspiracy Theorist)

by MapleAppleBittle



Series: My Best Friend is a Conspiracy Theorist [1]
Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Friendship, Gen, M/M, Steve Carlsberg is a Jerk, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-03-14
Packaged: 2018-01-15 16:15:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1311169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MapleAppleBittle/pseuds/MapleAppleBittle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Have you ever noticed how he never replaces his hubcaps? It’s laziness, pure and simple. Laziness." also known as the Unlikely Friendship between one Steve Thomas Carlsberg and Cecil Gershwin Palmer.</p>
<p>Steve and Cecil argue about scones.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hubcaps and Dry Scones (Or My Best Friend is a Conspiracy Theorist)

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Night Vale. I do not own the CHARACTERS in Night Vale. Partly because Night Vale does not actually exist, and partly because it belongs to Joseph Fink. Actually, mostly because it belongs to Joseph Fink. Anywho, carry on with your fic reading, and if you enjoy the story, leave a comment. (Although commenting isn't mandatory. Yet.)
> 
> Also, this is probably a little OOC, well..because Steve and Cecil friendship.

"Cecil, what the  _hell_ did you do?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about,  _Steve Carlsberg._ "

Steve narrowed his eyes, as Cecil hummed a small little diddly under his breath. Because, yes, Cecil (that _asshole_ ) knew EXACTLY what Steve was talking about. Or, rather, what Steve  _wasn't_ talking about. 

_"You switched the sugar for salt in my scones, you dick!"_

And Cecil immediately burst into laughter as Steve glared, arms crossed over his chest in a manner very similar to a petulant teenager. Which Steve was not.  Well... the less said about Steve's teenage years, the better. Because they really weren't all that much fun.

Steve first met Cecil Palmer in the summer of 1992, right before their freshman year at Night Vale High School. Steve was new to the town, Cecil lived nearby, and both of their parents agreed that Cecil would be the perfect person to show Steve the ropes around town. Which, at the time, they'd actually meant quite literally. The town was surrounded by a giant rope. Which was the first in an infinitely long line of things about Night Vale which confused Steve. But anyways, Cecil was forced to show Steve around town.

They could not stand each other at first.

Cecil was annoyed by Steve's constant (and often illegal) questions about the town. Steve hated the way Cecil always seemed to know everything about everything without even trying. And then...somehow...they became friends. Best friends, the kind that often traded insults with each other without meaning a single word. The kind who trash talked each other on the radio. The kind that played "harmless" practical jokes on each other.

Which led to days like today.

"This isn't funny, Cecil." Steve gritted through his teeth. He wasn't actually angry, though he'd never tell Cecil that. In fact, Steve found this whole thing kind of amusing. Kind of. But he couldn't properly teach Cecil a lesson without at least  _pretending_ to be mad.

"Oh, Steve, you aren't actually _angry_ , are you?" Cecil furrowed his brow in confusing. "It was just a joke!"

Their eyes met, and Steve had to resist the urge to laugh.

"Well...." He thought for a second. "Nope. Totally telling that hot scientist you like."

"Don't you  _dare_!" Cecil shrieked, his voice uncharacteristically high. 

Steve smirked.

"I don't know, Cec, you mi- _oof_." Steve grunted as Cecil tackled him to the ground. Because he was Cecil, and awfully insecure when it came to Carlos the Scientist. And also because Cecil really liked to tackle Steve.

"Okay, okay, let's call it a truce." Steve put his hands up in surrender as best he could while still being pinned underneath Cecil.

Cecil climbed off of Steve with a triumphant smirk. It would have been adorable if it weren't so annoying.

"Anyways, I have a bunch of other things I can tell Carlos about you." Steve smirked and relished the last few seconds of peace he had.

Still, he thought as Cecil chased him around the house, there really wasn't a better best friend than Cecil Gershwin Palmer.


End file.
